By Grace

When trauma comes into a new season, into a good season, into the kind of season I feel like I've been waiting my whole life for, there's something in my heart that cries out in exhaustion - how long, O Lord?

But if I can stop for a second, take it in, breathe, and pull myself back, I'm grateful. I'm grateful for good seasons, even ones that look like they're being ruined by old things. Even ones that look like they've come maybe a bit too early, like maybe I haven't matured enough yet for it but here it is anyway.

That's really it, isn't it? We want to believe, when our good seasons come, that we're ready for them. We want to believe that we've outgrown all those former things, put them away, put them behind us, worked through them - whatever terminology we want to use - and that we're somehow "ready" now to "just enjoy" something good. "Finally." 

Then...BAM. 

But you know what? I'm thankful. 

Because it's only by the grace of God. 

Your hard things in your good seasons are a gift from God. They are an invitation. An opportunity for healing. An offer of healing that only He can provide.

You'd think that a good season would teach you that God is good. And it does. But a good season that still requires wrestling with hard things can teach you even more about God than this. 

I think it's fair to say that I have learned my most important lessons through the hard things in my good seasons. I have learned far more in these times than I have ever learned in the hard times, the times when the only thing I could devote any meaningful energy to was simply surviving. 

But put me in a good season, and suddenly, I have the reserves. I have the energy. I have what I need to confront some things, to embrace them, to challenge them, to accept them. To learn to live with the gifts they bring, to wrestle with their trials. In my hard times in good seasons, I learn the very best of me - the kinds of things I had hoped I had already learned, the things I thought would make the good seasons truly good. 

Yet, here I am, learning them for real. The things I've dreamed of. The things I've worked for. The things I'm still working for. The things that I'm finding are just as good, if not better, as I always dreamed they would be and, even more than that, they're possible. 

As much as you dream for them, they aren't possible in your hard seasons. Not if you don't already have them on reserve. When you're in fight, flight, or freeze mode all the time, none of that inspires growth. None of that puts down roots. None of that matures. It can't; it's always either in motion or anti-motion, and for real good, you need something steady - not stagnant nor frantic. 

So I'm thankful for hard times in good seasons because they mean I'm growing. They mean I can keep growing. They mean that the things I've dreamed of and prayed for are possible. They mean that God's promises are real. 

By His grace alone. 

Amen.